By the twinkling lights

Of the Christmas tree, I opened her robe and pulled her close…

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We spent the evening alternately helping the kids hang ornaments on the tree and refereeing arguments over which kid got to hang which ornament on the tree.  Finally, the last ornament was placed on the tree, then I lifted PP to allow her to ceremonially place the angel on the top.  The kids insisted that we turn out all of the lights in the house except for the lights on the tree, which cast a multi-colored glow throughout the living room.  As the kids laid on the floor admiring their handiwork, I whispered in Veronica’s ear, “you know, once we get the kids to bed…”

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Veronica grabbed a quick shower after the kids were asleep, putting on nothing but her robe when she was done.  She emerged from the bathroom to find me lounging in the living room, the only light the soft glow from the tree.  I rise up and meet her, kissing her gently on the forehead and whispering

This has been a wonderful evening

Yes, it has.  Even with the knuckleheads bickering!

And I know the perfect way to finish it

I pull the blanket off the couch and spread it on the floor by the tree.  We sink to the floor, my clothes coming off in the process, kissing each other gently, tenderly even.  I move on top of her and pull her rob open, exposing her creamy white skin and pink nipples.  Kissing my way down her body, I pause briefly to lavish attention on her nipples, then keep moving.  Reaching her delicate sex, I use just the very tip of my tongue to tease her, working up and down.  She spreads her legs wider and moans her approval of my efforts until I abruptly stop.  Moving back up her torso, I kiss her, deeply, sharing her taste with her.  Shifting my hips, I gently thrust, pushing my way into her, eliciting a deep moan of satisfaction from my beautiful, sexy wife.

What follows is nothing more than love-making between a man and woman who know each others every signal, reading each other perfectly, changing pace and depth occasionally, knowing just how to bring each other right to the brink of orgasm.

Then reaching the peak together, indecipherable utterances the only sounds between them.

By the twinkling light of the Christmas tree, there is no other place I’d rather be.

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This is my contribution for this month’s group post, organized by Kimberly aka The Errant Wife.  Veronica is also contributing and has a slightly different take on sex by the light of the Christmas tree…

Check out what these other sexy bloggers were inspired to write based on nothing more than the prompt “By the twinkling lights of the…”

Amy:http://www.moresexchocolateandredlipstick.wordpress.com
Gray – http://mygrayline.blogspot.com
Veronica: http://anothersuburbanmom.blogspot.com
Dangerous Lilly: http://dangerouslilly.com
FG Sakes: http://fgsakes.blogspot.com/
Topaz:          http://topaz-gemology.blogspot.com
BDenied: http://cuckold-husband-bdenied.blogspot.com
Salt and Pepper @ http://cellobiscuit.blogspot.com
Ronjazz: www.ronjazz.blogspot.com
Duchess: http://theduchessissexy.blogspot.com
Petal: http://secretlifeofaslummymummy.blogspot.com/
Autumn    http://autumnmistspeaks.blogspot.com
Barefoot Dreaming: http://dreamingbearfoot.blogspot.com
and Kimberly: http://yourerrantwife.blogspot.com

Swing Shift Volume 24- Single Men in the Lifestyle

A faithful reader responded to my request for Swing Shift ideas on yesterday’s post, but asked to remain anonymous, so you’ll just have to guess who might have written the following:

So I’ve got this friend who is currently in a relationship. He has, for the entirety of the relationship and for the foreseeable future, cheated on her with many, many, many people (present company possibly included).  Anyway, the girlfriend really doesn’t know, or if she does, thinks it’s only been one or two people in the early part of their relationship. She is not down with sharing him. She also believes they will someday get married. He knows this will not happen.

So that’s the backstory. The real question is that he would prefer to be in an open relationship or swinging situation (easier than lying and cheating!). That’s what he wants for a marriage or long-term partnership. Being the helpful person I am, I’m wondering how he could possibly meet other like-minded people. Are the swinger websites welcoming to singles looking for other singles? Or is it more of a place for the already coupled? I doubt he’d go to a specialized club or event on his own, so the options are probably limited on that front. I can see him thriving in an open relationship, it’s just a matter of getting him into one first.

Thoughts?

Oh boy, I guess it’s time to direct readers to my Marriage and Infidelity post, which generated some rather heated discussion in the comments. [It kinda sucked to read those comments again, I feel like I lost a friend because of that post.]  Read the post and I think you’ll get an idea how I feel about this man’s intentions where his girlfriend and a possible future marriage are concerned.

More to the point for Swing Shift, the key question is, how does a single guy find a single woman who is interested in swinging as well?  Damned if I know!

Let’s first consider the sheer number disadvantage a guy is up against in the lifestyle.  I did a search on Swappernet first for single men within 25 miles of my zip code, ages 25-45, no other limits on the search and turned up 117 results.  Then, I repeated the search, looking for a woman and only turned up 17 results.  117/17, that’s a 7:1 single male to single female ratio.  Not exactly good odds.

Veronica: There are some ‘gangbang’ groups around here that look for single men, but I think that a guy would have better luck getting 50 yard line tickets for the Patriots than getting into that group.  I also think that your friend does not want to share woman with half a dozen guys at the same time.

I’ll admit a bias against younger couples and/or couples that haven’t been together very long who are in the lifestyle.  I’ve read and heard numerous other swingers and poly types talk about the strength of the primary relationship being critical to being able to share one’s partner with others.  I’m skeptical that a couple that has only been together for a short amount of time has forged that bond.  Let’s face it, watching your partner fuck someone else and like it, can be tremendously arousing experience, but it can also be the opposite and elicit emotions that no one expected.  I believe that a strong relationship with a solid foundation and good communication skills can cope with the unexpected, and that a newer, less “mature” relationship may not.  Not that it can’t, but I think the odds are against it.  I’m sure that some of you may disagree with me, and I’m comfortable with that. 

Veronica:  I agree.  Look at the drama we had with Dina and Derek.  I think that the majority of that spawned from the fact that they had only been together for less than 2 years and just moved in together.   It takes a real sense of security with your partner to share.  I think that the security can take years to build.

If I knew this friend that is looking for a swinging partner-for-life, I don’t know what I’d tell him.  In fact, I’m skeptical that he’s looking for a swinging relationship at all.  It seems like he’s more interested in casual sex with multiple partners and not being committed to any of them. 

Veronica: I think he does want to have his cake and eat it too, having the perks of marriage and the perks of single men. If he really wants to find someone who might be open to the lifestyle I would suggest that he look for an active bi-woman.  I think that a woman who is going to want to have relationships with both men and women will be more open to the concept of an open relationship.

Back to one of my readers specific questions, swinging does seem to be more for the already-coupled, to borrow her phrase.  I repeated that search on Swappernet, this time for couples, and found 196 couples.  Which an optimistic single man would point out if more than the single men, so his odds of finding a single woman are theoretically better than than a couples!

One thing I should mention is that in our [limited] experience, there is a bias against single men.  Many profiles state “no single men” or “single men, don’t contact us, we’ll contact you if we’re interested” or something similar to that, and clubs and parties either don’t allow men at all or strictly limit the number of men who can attend a given event.  My feeling is that many swingers are like Veronica and I and see it as primarily a couple-centric activity.

Veronica: However, we always make an exception for a nice single woman.  Or two.

That’s my girl!!

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As always, comments are more than welcome, especially fellow swingers or people in other forms of open relationships.  Am I off-base with my anti-young couple bias?  What are your thoughts on this man and his intentions?

I have a question from another reader about infidelity in the lifestyle, but part of me feels like I’ve been down that road before and don’t really have anything new to say, so I’m not sure if I want to go there again.  If you’re curious about previous posts on the topic, just put “infidelity” in the seach bar over there on the left, there are several posts to read!

Unicorns and Compliments

We might have finally found a local unicorn to hook up with!

Waaaaay back in the early summer of 2008, Veronica had a profile on Adult Friend Finder, seeking a woman to play with and explore what at the time was her curiosity about being with another woman.  18 months later, and all of the 3somes we have had have been with blogger friends [not that I'm complaining, by any means!!!].  But we’ve completely failed to find a local woman who wanted to join us.

There are some single woman on Swappernet, but not many.   I had read this one woman’s profile before and never dreamed of contacting her.  Without going into too much detail [perhaps some other time...], she has a voracious sexual appetite and based on the pictures and videos on her profile, she has no trouble finding friends to play with.  I figured that a message from us would just be another one of many that gets tossed aside.

So imagine my surprise when she contacted us!  And she’s been persistent, following up on occasion, wondering when we’re free to see her.

The only reason it’s taken so long, other than holidays, which was part of it, is that she is only available during during the day, and not on weekend.  Yes, that screams cheating wife to me too….

She’s coming over on Thursday afternoon.  Perhaps I’ll have something to write about after her visit

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Every week, I make sure to check out the blogs that post their favorite HNTs of the week- part of me always hopes see myself or Veronica on one of those lists, but it rarely happens.  [Actually, does anyone EVER include a guy on their Friday favorites list? I don't think I've ever seen one.]  But those lists are also good for discovering new and sexy bloggers that I didn’t know about before.

Vixen always has outstanding selections- she has an eye for and an appreciation of fine photography.  Just look at her list on any Friday and see for yourself!  So imagine my surprise when I saw that Veronica’s HNT is on her list this week!  So Vixen, as Veronica’s very happy spouse [and photographer!], thank you!

Jade writes a blog called A Poly Life, which I enjoy reading, for obvious reasons, if only from the title alone.  Occasionally she posts a list of blogs she likes to read and wants others to know about.  I was reading her list on Friday and came across this down at the bottom of the post:

Hubman’s Hangout:  While not a poly-focused site, Hubman’s blog deals with the swinging lifestyle with the clear-headedness and careful consideration that I sometimes think poly folk should emulate more. He can also be found on Twitter at http://twitter.com/Hubman38.

Wow.  Seriously, I’m flattered that someone things of me and my blog in those terms.  Thank you Jade, I appreciate the compliment!

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My dad is still here and will be until tomorrow.  We’re enjoying his visit, but he’s really cramping our blogging activities!  I’m behind on my blog reading and have 3 posts I need to write- something for Swing Shift tomorrow [any ideas? fire away!!!], erotica for Tuesday [it's time for the monthly group post organized by The Errant Wife, contact her if you want to play along], and I’m also scheduled to post on The Real World: Venus vs. Mars on Tuesday, sharing my thoughts about the possibility of a birth control pill for men.

To answer my friend’s question on Twitter last night- No, my dad is not interfering with our sex life.  We’re just quieter

Bill Gates is Satan

The title of this post was also my Gmail status last night and sums up how I feel about Microsoft.

In September of 2008 Veronica and I bought a second computer for home.  This was just a few weeks after I started my own blog, and with just one computer and her own blog reading and writing activity, one computer wasn’t going to cut it any longer.  Against my better judgment, she came home from a big box electronics store with a Dell with Windows Vista.  All I knew about Vista was that people were complaining about how Microsoft re-arranged how a lot of features looked and where they were located, and that with Microsoft’s history of releasing bug-ridden software requiring patches, I wasn’t too excited.

Then in the last few months I heard that Microsoft, basically acknowledging how suck-tastic Vista was, was coming out with Windows 7.  Again, I was leery of the hype, but reading some reviews here and there, it seemed to be pretty well received.

Lately my computer was hanging up more and more often. [The new/Vista computer is "mine" and is also known as "the naughty computer".  That's where all of our pics, homemade video, and links to various lifestyle websites are located.  And it's the computer we hide when family visits!]  More often then not, when I’d opened the computer to take it out of sleep mode, it would lock up, the only way to get past it would be to hold down the power button and force a reboot.  Do that once or twice every day and the $120 pricetag to upgrade to Win7 was starting to look pretty good.

So I went for it.  You think I’d be writing this post if the installation went smoothly?  HA!

Step one is to run this compatability checker, which tells me that I should uninstall iTunes, McAfee VirusScan and the Dell Modem Diagnostic Tool.  Okay, no problem, I can do that.  Except I can’t find the modem tool in the list of programs to modify or uninstall.  So I skip in and proceed with the installation.

90 minutes later and 60% through step 5 of 5, the install freezes.  I leave it alone for a while, since one of the earlier status screens warned that the install could take several hours.  But then I return and it’s still stuck.  My only option is to force a re-boot and pray that it reverts back to Vista and I haven’t killed my computer.  Fortunately, it’s okay.

Lilly suggested that I run a disk clean-up, defragment, then run my anti-virus software.  Well, I had already removed VirusScan, so I just heeded her first 2 suggestions.  I also disconnected my external hard drive before trying to install Win7 again.  The external drive was originally connected because 1) I backed up my computer before starting the upgrade process [this is the naughty computer, with 1500+ pictures on it!] and 2) the compatibility checker utility directed me to attach any peripheral USB devices before I ran it.  Then I dug around and after a few minutes finally found the modem utility that needed removed, which I did.  I re-ran the compatibility checker and everything appeared okay, no errors or warnings.

But wait, there’s more!

I tried to install Win7 again, only to get an error message, something about a temp file that could not be created because it already existed.  Thinking, what could it hurt, I rebooted the computer, which did the trick.  Take two of my attempt to upgrade from Vista to Win7 is underway.

As I’m writing this [on the "family computer"], it’s now 12:30 am. I started this entire process around 7:00pm and am tired.

I just checked the status of the install.

It’s currently frozen at the exact same spot as 4 hours ago.

Fuck.

Now what do I do?

I’m going to bed, leaving the install program running.  Maybe it will magically un-freeze inself during the night and I’ll awake to an upgraded operating system.

But I doubt it.  And I’ll be back to square one.

So much for the hype over Windows 7, I can’t even get it installed

UPDATE: Saturday, 4pm.  I gave up on upgrading, double-checked my back-up files and did a clean install of Win7, which went off without a hitch.  Documents and settings are restored and I’m working on re-installing the software.  That was entirely too painful to accomplish…

The Hanukkah Song

Since this evening is the start of Hanukkah, it’s time for Adam Sandler and “The Hanukkah Song”?  Enjoy!

Damn Real Life

Getting in the way of my online life!

After a full day at work on Thursday, Veronica and I went out for a date Thursday night.  We had a nice dinner, just the two of us, then met some friends [yes, that type of friends!] at a local sports bar. Once it was late enough that we knew our kids would be asleep, we all returned to the house.

You ever have those nights when you’re too tired to have sex?  Maybe the mind is willing but the body just isn’t playing along?

Thursday night was one of those nights.  Fortunately, it wasn’t just me, it was the other guy as well, and the ladies understood.  This was the 4th time we’ve gotten together with them, and the first time that either of us failed to respond as we normally do.  So neither lady was left wondering “Is it me? Now that he’s seen me nekkid, doesn’t he like me that much?”

Nonetheless, we had a great time with our friends, who we hadn’t seen in over 3 months.

So it that a good enough excuse for this lame filler post?

My dad is coming to visit on Friday and will be staying until Sunday, so my computer time will probably be limited this weekend.  So no sitting around the living room browsing blogs while dad is here!  And I missed a lot of HNTs since we were out on Thursday evening, but I’ll make the rounds during the weekend.  I can always take the laptop in the bedroom!

For something a little more interesting,  today is the day when Veronica and a bunch of her blog friends post their favorite holiday cookie recipes as part of a virtual cookie exchange.  Visit her blog to check it out and for links to all of the participants.

Thanks for all of the nice comments on my HNT yesterday.  Except for the one person who called me a sicko.  This is the other picture I was considering for the click-thru image.  I just felt like sharing it, for no particular reason.

Have a good weekend!

HNT Blacklight Edition

A few weeks ago we picked up 2 cheapie blacklights at a novelty shop.  I played around with them on my Thanksgiving Day HNT, but wasn’t really thrilled with the final images.  However, with the right color clothing and backdrop, I’ve found that I can get some pretty cool looking pictures, without even having to resort to Photoshop tricks!

*click-click*

Veronica is having fun wrapping presents this week and Osbasso is the man to see for the rest of the nekkidness.  Don’t forget to check the sidebar on his blog, there are holiday-themed HNTs for the next 3 weeks, if you’re interested.

Happy Half-Nekkid Thursday!!!

And Happy Birthday to my Dad, who was born 66 yrs ago today…

When big isn’t big enough

Make no mistake about it, Veronica enjoys a man with a larger-than-average cock.  That’s not to say that a big cock is a requirement to have a chance with her, but all else being equal, she’d prefer the bigger man.  And claims never to have had a lover who was too big for her.  (Veronica: It’s true, but I am always willing to test the theory!)

Years ago, she boldly suggested that perhaps I would be interested in fucking her with a penis extension, knowing that I was interested in seeing her try to take something really big [this was waaaaaay before we ever thought about swinging!].  She’s never really been into dildos [or rather, they've never been into her, hahaha] and rebuffed the idea when I bought her an extra-large jelly dong years ago. (Veronica:  I just couldn’t get into the Jelly Dong.  I hated the texture and the smell and it looked like a gummy worm gone very, very wrong.)

Then she found the Cyberskin 3″ penis extension.  We bought one and had lots of fun with it, it added a level of play and fantasy-fulfillment to our sex life.  Eventually, the toy suffered a fatal tear and we said goodbye to it.

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Not too long ago, Jamie from The Adult Toy Shoppe contacted me and inquired as to whether I would be interested in reviewing toys for them.  I immediately said yes and suggested to Veronica that perhaps it was finally time to replace our Cyberskin friend.  The Adult Toy Shoppe has one efficient shipping department!  Less than a week after Jamie first contacted me, there was a USPS package from them on my doorstep!

The packaging is kinda cheap and not suitable for storage of the toy.  We’ll eventually have to find something to store it in.  It comes with some lube and also some talcum powder-ish stuff to put on it for storage.  The material gets tacky and sticks to stuff when it’s dry and the powder helps prevent that.  The instructions say that it can be cleaned with soap and water, so since it can’t really be sterilized, it’s not appropriate for sharing amongst other lovers.

The toy is about 7 3/4 long overall and about 1 3/4 inches wide at the widest point.  However, the material is really stretchy, as this picture shows, so the added girth is going to vary depending on how much the material is stretched by the wearer.  It’s also stretchy length-wise, so I could pull it almost all the way down to the base of my cock [I'm, umm, longer than the inner depth of the toy].  Because of the width of the extension and the size of my cock, I end up with this kinda tapered look that I don’t naturally have, as you can see here.  It looks a little funny to me, but I’ll leave it to Veronica to describe how it feels to get fucked when I’m wearing it.

Veronica: I do like the toy as every now and again I like a little extra something.  I like the texture and smell of the toy, and the feel is very soft and flesh like.  The package does not really describe what the product is made of, but it is not made of PVC, phthalates, or latex.  Whatever the materials or lack of materials, I do not find this toy to be irritating.  I do not like to put hard plastic in me and my vagina skin is a little soft and sensitive so some materials can irritate my vagina, which I find can lead to ladybit issues.

I love the feeling of fullness and the slight burn of the stretch of my pussy while Hubman is fucking me with the product.  The only thing that I find annoying is that the product does not always stay on. [Hubman: It's important for me to make sure it's all the way on- it basically forms a vacuum to stay on.  If there is a little air trapped inside the toy, it'll have a little bit of a slinky effect.  Does that make sense?] Sometimes I will feel the tip of the extension hit my cervix, then Hubman will continue to enter me all the way, hammering the extension into my cervix.  It’s a slightly odd feeling, though not a bad one.  I wonder how effective this product is for a smaller man.  The extension is a pretty snug fit for Hubman, yet it still slides off if not worn correctly.  I wonder how a less endowed man would be able to keep the extension on. [Yeah, 'cause I'm so freakin' big.  Hahaha]

In the end though, I really enjoy the feeling of extra cock, and the extension will be a favorite amongst the toy collection.

One drawback with this toy is some loss of sensation.  One the one hand, it’s not a problem, because I’m so excited to see Veronica take all of me and the toy!  But, I’ve never cum while wearing this, because of the loss of sensation.  However, normally Veronica and I will start without it, then she’ll ask me to use it for a while, then I’ll remove it to finish.  Which is what we did on Sunday night

The Cyberskin 3″ extension is a welcome (re-)addition to our toy collection and if past history is any indication, it will get plenty of use in the future.  Thanks again to Jamie and The Adult Toy Shoppe for sending us this toy.  [In the interest of full disclosure, they gave us the toy for free in exchange for our review.  Just so you know...]

Swing Shift Volume 23- Keeping Secrets

At the beginning of last weeks post, I solicited comments on the following column suggestion from an anonymous reader:

How do you balance and/or separate your “everyday” life and your “swinger” life?

Obviously your non-swinging friends and family and co-workers don’t know about this other side of your life. And your swinging friends aren’t the ones you’d invite to a family barbecue with your folks. Or a playdate with the kids. Or would you? Do you ever feel like you are leading a double life? Do you keep the two areas compartmentalized? Or do they bleed over into each other?

I’m curious about how people might approach that aspect of discreet polyamory.

Playfully Yours responded with the following:

I truly believe that it is a double life!  Sometimes it was hard and other times it was so exciting.
The hard part was when husbands would try and hook-up or meet outside of the initial arrangement.

I even had some call me after the couple broke up and wanted to be with me as well.  I didn’t do it!  It was more because he could be a sarcastic butthole.  I know it was his personality but I don’t want to deal with that 24/7.

It was hard when I said to Vanilla friends and family that I had plans.  What made it hard was those inquiring about a NEW man for myself and not disclosing where I went and dodging that bullet.  I ultimately said I was staying home and watching a movie or not feeling great and wanted to veg.  It helped not having to deal with all the questions.  Sometimes I did say I had a booty-call.  People do understand that.

I did find my sexual equal for 6 months….I miss that.

All in all it was a great sexual experience and learning more about myself.

First of all, thanks to Playfully Yours for the comment, we appreciate it!  We don’t have any family within a 4 hr drive, and explaining what we’re doing when we go out is not an issue, so we consider ourselves fortunate in not having to deal with that.  If we did, we could easily explain some of our date nights- we have always believed that even in marriage you should never stop dating your spouse.  Even now, about once a month Veronica and I will get a sitter and go out, just the two of us.  Sometimes, we do wonder if the neighbors suspect anything.  Our friend next door has commented “what do you guys do when you go out so often?”  Of course, this is the same woman who seemingly hasn’t gone out on a date with her hubby in months, so she wouldn’t understand.  We’ve even offered to watch the kids so that they could go out, but they never take us up on the offer.

I can sympathize, I think, with the gay man or woman who is afraid of coming out of the closet.  [Yes, I realize that being gay or bi- is part of who someone is, it's not a choice, while swinging is a choice, something we could give up if we wanted or needed to.  So don't crucify me for that statement, okay?]  Part of me would like to be open about the lifestyle that we lead, that we enjoy sharing ourselves with other lovers and having group sex.  But the reality is that swinging is not acceptable to ‘mainstream’ society and there are possible personal and professional ramifications if certain people knew that Veronica and I are swingers, not to mention if they knew about this blog!!

Along those lines, several months ago Veronica and I created another blog, one that no one who reads this blog will ever know about.  We freely talk about blogging in front of the kids and they’ve obviously meet our blogger friends who have come to visit us.  To protect ourselves in case either of the kids mentions blogging in front of family or vanilla friends, we created that family blog. Which we even occasionally update with typical parents-bragging-about-the-kids kind of stuff!

Veronica:  I have to admit that it is fun having a sexy “secret identity”.  I like being an unassuming civil servant by day and a wanton wench by night. However it is challenging to maintain that secret identity.  I am very glad that I have mine and Hubman’s blogs so we have a place to tell our secrets.  Since all of our relatives live about four hours away, we are spared the issue of prying parents and siblings.  Still it can be challenging to make sure that Hubman and I have identical cover stories for who we are visiting and why, and coming up with a plausible explanation of our new found love of travel and going out.

Since the kids are younger, it is easier to hide where we are going and what (who) we are doing, but once DB stops falling asleep at 9:00pm, we will lose our ability to host and face some new challenges.

Then there are the friends.  The question of “What did you do this weekend?” is one to be dealt with.

We keep ourselves careful to have the “family” laptop and the “naughty” laptop, and never, ever let our family members see our phones.

In the beginning of our swinging we let people meet our children, but we have decided not to do that going forward unless we are very comfortable with them.  I don’t want the kids wondering why they meet people who are very friendly and then they *poof* out of our lives.   If we became friends with a couple we would probably be fine with inviting them to a ‘mixed’ party, as long  as we had a cover story of how we met organized before the party.

I think its possible to blend your two worlds, as long as you are careful about how you do it.

That was an interesting dinner that she’s referring to.  I had a conference in Seattle, Veronica came with me, and our blogger friends Emmy and Garbonzo came up from Portland to meet and spend a few days together.  The four of us ended up going out to dinner one night with my former office-wife Lisa from grad school and the research assistant/”mom” from the lab that Lisa and I trained in.  I really had to work to suppress a grin, looking across the table at one of best friends from my ‘vanilla’ life sitting right next to a very good friend from the ‘naughty’ side of my life.

In response to a tweet I left soliciting comments for this post, WeeBeeTweetin’ wrote to me

That’s a tough one! I can only have RL friends on Facebook, none of the REAL people I’ve met and become friends with from the net

I’m glad she made that comment, because I totally forgot about Facebook!  Veronica and I have perhaps a half-dozen or so bloggers that we’re also friends with on Facebook.  No one has ever said anything to us, but I do wonder if my mom or my sister looks at my Facebook page and wonders who Southern Vixen, M, Emmy, or Garbanzo are [under their real names, of course!].  For us, those are blogger friends that we trust implicitly, and if any family members would ask who they are, we’d use the ‘they’re just old college friends’ excuse.  Between moving around somewhat [7 residences in 4 states over 16 yrs], multiple colleges [5 degrees from 4 schools between the two of us], and my prior military service, it’s entirely plausible to have friends scattered about the country. So in certain instances, we’re comfortable with blog-life and real-life intersecting.  But we’re careful.

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How about you? Whether you’re a swinger, a cheating spouse, into BDSM, or concealing an aspect of your sexuality in any way, how do you keep your secrets? Or don’t you?  Have you ever ended up in an uncomfortable situation because your secret life was discovered?  We’d like to hear your stories, so please share them in the comments.

We’re running out of ideas for future Swing Shift columns.  PLEASE, if you have any questions about the lifestyle whatsoever, don’t be shy about asking us.  Otherwise, this will cease to be a regular weekly feature and we’ll only write   You can leave a comment on this post or e-mail me at hubman38 at gmail dot com.  As always, if you prefer to remain anonymous just let me know that in your e-mail and I’ll honor your request.

The always fabulous Amorous Rocker has come up with the idea of a blogger toy fundraiser, in support of Toys for Tots.  Veronica and I have already made a donation and we’re encouraging you to check out her post to learn more about it.

Firsts

I saw that Osbasso did this earlier today, and has for the last several years, so I thought I’d give it a whirl, since I now have 12 months of posts on one blog [my Blogspot blog only lasted about 4 months in 2008].

What was the first line from your blog the first day of each month in 2009?

January – “So, we know it’s been a long, strange trip for us, and before we go forward we should probably go back and recap, since with this blog we may be picking up some new readers.”- This is from Jan 3rd, the very first post on this blog, called How We Got Here.  If you’re interested in how Veronica and I became swingers, this is the post to read!

February -”For last weeks HNT I wrote about one of our trysts with Southern Vixen during our weekend with her.”  This is from Safe Sex?, pretty much a self-explanatory title…

March – “Obviously, my title today is a bit facetious!” from a post called High Class Strip Club.

April – “No, you perverts, not that kind of flesh pile!!” From HNT Flesh Pile Edition, which was actually a retro HNT with me and the kids playing in the living room.

May – “Yesterday afternoon I started my weekend early and got home around 2pm.” From Coincidence?, about a little webcam sex fun during National Masturbation Month.

June – “Or at least gently bump into one another…”  The post was called When World’s Collide, the only time some of our blogger friends meet some of our real-life friends.

July – “Last night I had a revelation” from Taste.

August – “Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America”.  Look at that, it only took until August for the list to include something besides sex and nekkidness!  From Political Correctness, with some alternative definitions for some common terms.

September – “Lilly, of DangerousLilly.com, is giving away an Njoy Pure Wand courtesy of EdenFantasys!” So much for that entry, someone else won it

October- “Curious after what you saw last week, you pass by my house again, wondering what you’ll see this time.” This is from HNT Voyeur (Retro Edition). Come take a look….

November – “But what the hell, I blog anonymously, and while there are some of you reading who I’ve gotten to know in “real life”, I’m pretty sure you won’t judge me harshly.”  This is from my post Not Sure About Sharing This One, my first solo exploration with a prostate massage toy.

December – “I have a bunch of random thoughts rattling around in my melon [lots of empty space for that to happen...], so in no particular order:” from Apropos of Nothing, just the other day.

Feel free to steal this and do it yourselves!

And speaking of firsts, this post is scheduled to auto-post at 6pm eastern, which is when our sitter should be arriving and Veronica and I will be heading out on a first date with a couple we just met.  There may be tales to tell tomorrow