Now Open For Business!
Posted by hubman38 on June 21, 2009
For whatever reason, some of you out there in the blogosphere seem to think that Veronica and I have some experience in the lifestyle and can be helpful. In the past several months, no less than 8-10 individuals have contacted us privately, seeking advice about the lifestyle. Which is perhaps ironic, since as we were getting involved in the lifestyle ourselves we relied heavily on the advice of our dear friend SwingerWife, to the point that we were texting back and forth with her as we were driving to our very first ‘date’ with another couple. We’ve benefitted greatly from not only her advice, but from a host of other people who we’ve met in the lifestyle and have helped us out along the way.
I guess the myriad of lifestyle websites are too impersonal or something. Maybe knowing that we’re ‘real’ people, who have had our fair share of struggles, successes, conflicts, amazing experiences, and mis-communications holds some appeal.
We’d like to think that any advice we’ve given has been helpful, or at least not harmful, so I think it’s time for “Hubman and Veronica’s Swinger’s Advice Service” to open for business!
And the first order of business will be to come up with a better name, because that one sucks…
The only acceptable form of payment will be nekkid pictures. That or sexual favors 
Seriously, stealing from the regular “Ask the Hot Dads” column that I contribute too [new post up on Monday, by the way...], I think I might start a semi-regular feature where I take readers questions, anonymously if desired, and answer them in a post. What do you think, would you be interested? I think we owe it to the people that have helped us to in turn help others, if possible. Veronica would give her perspective as well, of course.
Communication issues. Performance anxiety. How to write a good profile on a website. What are parties really like. Avoiding jealousy. Full- or soft-swap, and what’s the difference anyway? Safe sex concerns. Nothing would be off-limits, no concern too big or too small.
So leave a comment or e-mail me [address on the left in the "About me..." section] and leave me your questions. If you’d prefer that we keep your identity anonymous, just say so. And if you have a question and would prefer we don’t write a post about it, we’d still be more than happy to answer it anyway.
Darling Boy in a few more years-
Have a good Monday! I know I will, I’m on vacation 
Barefoot Dreaming said
love that bottom pic!
I hope you have some *bites*
Grace said
I think that is a great idea, and a good way to “give back”, not to mention downright entertaining!
Dharma said
Oh, give me a minute. I’m sure I’ll think of something to ask.
I know I’ve got a million questions swirling in my head. Even though I like to fancy myself a woman who pretty much knows everything and has experienced almost everything, the bottom line is I simply have no idea how it goes down (pun fully intended) once a couple has decided to dip their toes into the swinging waters…or any of the variations, thereof.
I have looked for a manual. I don’t think it exists.
Having a mentor should be a requirement, someone to hold your hand as you explore uncharted territory. In the absence of a mentor, I will firmly enjoy an advice column that would make Ann Landers and Emily Post wet themselves.
Thanks for putting it out there!
Grace said
I think that is a great idea, and a good way to “give back”, not to mention downright entertaining!
Sorry… forgot to say great post – can’t wait to read your next one!
hubman38 said
Barefoot Dreaming- Glad you like the picture! I hope we get some bites too. I’d much prefer real questions from readers than making up hypothetical situations to illustrate a point.
Grace- entertaining AND educational? I could say something snarky, but that’s actually the idea!
Dharma- Thanks for delurking and don’t be shy with your questions. Please, give me a reason to write something that would make Ann Landers or Emily Post wet themselves!
Grace- thanks!
Topaz said
I love the idea of taking questions, and I (unfortunately) thought of the cheesiest name (SwapInfo) I know! It’s cheesy. I only write it so you avoid it, and admit to my cheesiness.
And I LOVE the pic used for DearBoy. oh my, could you ever imagine? I already find it hard to ‘come off’ as a tame-non-smoking woman to my stepdaughter, I can’t imagine having her learn of any of my other tendencies. Brings me to a question you can field (if you so choose to pursue your unnamed venture…) What are your thoughts on prepping children on sexual attitudes (both boys and girls), and what is the healthiest way to handle a situation if they ever were to find out anything?
Cher said
Hope you are great Hubman! Have a wonderful week.
April said
I think that’s a fabulous idea! My ex-husband and I dabbled in the lifestyle. Well, we attempted to anyway. At first we tried just having another woman for both of us, and that was amazing! Then we moved up to couples. Well *one* couple is as far as we got. He couldn’t deal with seeing me with another man. His poor wife tried and tried and tried to keep his dick hard and it just stayed flaccid. Prior to that he’d never had that problem. He told me afterward that he thought he could handle it, but he was wrong. So, after that the only couple experience we had involved me playing with her while the guys watched, then we played with our respective partners. I was a little disappointed, as I wanted to experience this more, but I loved him and respected his uncomfortableness.
Anyway, the point I’m trying to make was that we had so many questions that were hard to get answered. Especially when you’re not trying to broadcast that you’re interested in swinging.
Go for it! I think it’ll be very helpful to hear “real” people give advice.
April said
Wait, that paragraph was confusing. The wife of the other couple couldn’t get my husband’s dick hard. And she was fucking hot, too! Ok, that’s enough thinking about her……
Another Suburban Mom said
I can’t wait to get some questions! This will be a lot of fun!
NY Diva said
lol @Topaz, I think SwapInfo is a great name! Seconded!
Maybe people come to you for advice because you’re new enough to still remember what it’s like to get started and not so far into it that you’re intimidatingly experienced. Like how you want to lose your virginity to someone who knows what to do but doesn’t have do much experience that they laugh at your inexperience. Or something.
sexie sadie said
Go for it, you two! I look forward to reading your advice. I considered doing the same thing because I get people seeking advice too, although mine are usually from people trying to figure out their own vanilla relationships. I’ve never understood exactly why they ask me!
But, I think it sounds like you two could offer some much-needed perspective on the subject of swinging… and whatever else pops up! Have fun with it!
xo~Sadie
PS. I think you should call it “Swing-Shift” – Swingers working a shift as advice-givers
xo~Sadie
hubman38 said
Topaz- Your question about dealing with the kids is a great one and sure to be addressed in a post someday!
Cher- nice to see you stop by for a change
April- Unfortunately, I can relate to your ex-husbands performance issue and will address that as well someday
ASM- I’m looking forward to it as well. And you better help me out!
NY Diva- hmm, maybe I’ll have to consider “SwapInfo”, cheesy as it is. Nice analogy
Sexy Sadie- oh, “Swing Shift”, that’s even better! Thanks for your support of the column idea!